One Change To Make That Crappy Show "Scooby Doo" Better:

Instead of a talking dog, Scooby is a talking gun. Suddenly this show is hilarious. Watch this easy plotline-

Scene One: The Scooby Gang runs into an abandoned <insert whatever here> which is haunted by a <insert monster here> who is really a man trying to steal treasure/counterfeit/make a fortune.

Scene Two: The monster rushes the gang, and Shaggy blasts off its kneecaps with Scooby. Shaggy gives Scooby a Scooby-Snack (bullets).

Scene Three: Monster-"I would have gotten away with it too if it wasn't for you meddling kids and your stupid GUN!" Scooby-"Scooby-dooby-*BLAM*"

The beauty of this new plotline is not only the fact that its a lot better than the original show, but it also only takes about 2 minutes. Which means the other 58 minutes in that hour can be used to air special 58 minute episodes of awesome shows like Family Guy. Or softcore porn. You know, I don't get softcore porn. Why even show it when people can get infinite hardcore porn online, commercial free, at any time of the day. Cable porn with more talking than tities just doesn't compare. If I were the head of one of those companies, I'd make the hardest-core porn as possible in an attempt to draw internet users away. And then to recoup the money spent on such things I'd sell the commerical time at high prices to things that really appeal to the all-male audiance that would watch these shows- Beef Jerkey, Guns, Cars, and of course more Porn. Its good business decisions like this that prove that I rock and that cable channel owners are just plain dumb.

-Update By Vampire Ninja